I want to live already!

So I read or heard this quote -- it was from an interview or a movie, i don’t remember -- it said “I want the whole world to know who I am,” and I realized that's what I want. We only live once, and I want to experience it as much as I can. I want to travel the world, I want to be famous, I want to be crazy rich, and I want to skydive. Not really, the whole concept of throwing my not-so-immortal-self out of a plane thousands of feet in the air to plummet back to the ground doesn’t appeal to me, But you get my point. I want to LIVE. I guess this is one of the reasons why I started this blog. To keep track of my thoughts, what I do, stupid things I say.

Side note: Is is okay to take 2 or 3 Advil? It says to only take one every 12 hours, but I have a massive headache and one isn’t really working. I’m ready to go take another one but I don’t want to end up like the girl in my choir last year who somehow OD-ed on Tylenol and ended up in the hospital claiming it was a suicide attempt. But the good news is I’m not suicidal! If I was that’d totes contradict everything I just wrote about.

Today I decided to “experience” instead of school. I didn’t really do anything exciting, but it was better the school. I went to Friday’s with Nicole and Jeremy, we went to get Jeremy a new cell phone, and we went to Barns&Noble where I sat in a chair with my peach Jones Soda and read an entire Post Secret book. I got more out of it then I would if I went to school. Yesterday in my Shakespeare class I started writing a blog:

“Remember film strips from like the 60’s? The ones that ding and you click to the next slide? I do. I wasn’t alive in the 60’s, but I am watching one of those film strips so I feel like I’m in the 60’s...only without the LSD. I’m sitting in Shakespeare class watching a film strip on Macbeth. We read that in 10th grade, and now I get to read it again. Awesome. Shakespeare class was probably the worst decision ever. It’s so boring! For tomorrow I have to write a 1,000 word letter to Shakespeare telling him what I thought of Othello. To be honest, I thought it was drawn out, morbid, and predictable.”

That’s all I wrote before the film strip ended. I always feel like I need a week long break between those classes. I have it again tomorrow, but I’m tempted not to go. We have a gun threat tomorrow, and my mom has spent the better part of the evening trying to convince me not to go at all tomorrow. I feel like I should go since I missed today, although tomorrow morning I’ll change my mind and not go. I can go experience Nicole’s living room or something instead.


Spice Girls just came on shuffle, and I’ve realized something. I think I like them more now then I did when I was in elementary school when there were crazy popular. I get crazy excited over songs like Wannabe, anything old Brittany Spears, Backstreet Boys, Nsync, or Hanson. In 2nd grade me and one of my best friends at the time bought the new Hanson CD (the one with Mmmbop) and went to her house and jumped on her bed and blasted it. A decade later she just had a baby and I still get excited when I listen to Hanson. (Which I did today.) It’s kinda funny how people change.


But while I’m talking about music, I have a bunch of new favorite songs!!! I’m currently addicted to Carla Bruni. I listen to her all the time. It’s really good music to relax to, or do homework to, or write to, or listen to in the shower...you know. Whatevs. Also it’s in French, so I don’t feel the need to obnoxiously sing along to every song ever. And also, “Die Alone” by Ingrid Michaelson is awesome. Nicole sent it to me when I was talking to her in the middle of the night trying to write a paper, and I love it. Seriously, I get some of my best music from random people sending things to me in the middle of the night while I’m writing papers and doing homework.

Did you know that technically you only are allowed 25 minutes per scrabble game? I didn’t. This is what I learn from the food network. I’m watching Ace of Cakes and they’re making a scrabble cake and getting all into it. One time it was this girl’s birthday and we didn’t really like her, so we put weird things in her cake. She still doesn’t know.

I’m kinda off topic from the whole “I want to experience life” thing. But the thing is, I don’t really feel like I’ve experienced anything lately. Although nothing profoundly excited has happened there have been some funny stories, like the lady from the changing room in Chelsea studios. I was were for an audition last week and afterwards I was changing and I couldn’t decide what shirt to wear. I had one that says; “War is over if you want it” and I wanted to wear it, but I was worried it would be to shear. I asked the lady what she thought and she goes; “There’s no such thing as too shear!” I ended up wearing the shirt, and she said “darlin'” a lot and now we’re best friends. Not really, but she was auditioning for The Producers, so if you’re reading this -- I HOPE YOU GET IT! The same day I was walking in Central Park (Iggie Pop ran by me...I thought he was dead, apparently not.) and we walked by Strawberry Fields and I decided to be cute and take a picture with my shirt in front of the Imagine thing and I thought I was all clever.

...And by thought I mean I am. I’m effing brilliant. Obvi.

I took this quiz in AP Psych to see if I had a well developed sense of myself. It was like those quizes in teenVouge where you add up how many A's, B's and C's, except instead of finding out if he's the one or what shade of BonnieBell lipsmakers (which I still wear) flavor describes your personality it told you weather or not you're a functioning member of society. I am. But my second highest score was the lowest level basically telling you that you have no idea who you are, you have no sense of yourself and you fail at life. Maybe it's because I can't function without things like my cell phone and iBook. Kinda like now. I didn't bring my computer to the theater today so I'm writing this out (But on the upside I do have my iPod, which I didn't have yesterday. I'm listening to Kate Nash, who I'm currently addicted to). After a while you run our of things to do during your 20 minute break during act two and the only things left are taking slightly provocative and slightly more hilarious pictures like this or blogging, and I really want my iBook. But we rough it here. Kinda like how my vitamin water sat up against the make-up lights druing act one and got all warm so it's now sitting outside of a side door getting cold again instead of in a fridge. I don't like warm vitamin water.


We had some random people backstage today. Nicole is here so she came back for a little bit before the show while I was getting ready and it was totally chill then, but intermission was crazy and then people came back and kicked everyone out. But for some reason the green room was like a giant mosh pit. Speaking of giant, that's the size of my headache. I have a love/hate relationship with two show days. I'm currently hating it because I have a major headache and I have to do another show tonight. Maybe it's because Bailey was over 'til 1:00 last night and I got up at 8:30 to go shopping with my friend. It's his birthday. It's also National Hug A Gay Day so it's like his birthday times eight. That and the fact that a singing telegram dressed as Prince Charming showed up to the theater to sing to him. He did it in the lobby so the audience saw it too. We have it on video, and it's already on facebook...less then a day after it happened. Which goes to show how facebook controls people's lives, is more addicting then meth, and ruins families. Not really, but it's my main reason for not getting things done.